Embracing compassionate resolutions: A Shift towards self-love

As we usher in the New Year, the air is thick with the age-old tradition of setting resolutions. Gyms are flooded with eager newcomers, diet plans are meticulously devised, and the collective mindset shifts to the pursuit of self-improvement. However, in our compassionate practice, we challenge the conventional wisdom of New Year's resolutions. Instead of feeling like we have to change our bodies, let's appreciate the beauty of making small, achievable goals that focus on being kind to ourselves and taking care of our whole selves.

January 1st: Set-up for a Shame Spiral
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On January 1st, people usually try to make changes, but often these are about how they look on the outside. This makes them feel bad about themselves. The implicit message is that our bodies are in need of fixing or upgrading. This often includes rigid diet or exercise regimens, all-or-nothing thinking, and isn’t sustainable. It also creates a culture that perpetuates shame and guilt. This mentality sets the stage for a shame spiral, a destructive cycle that hinders our ability to embrace and appreciate our bodies as they are.

At our practice, we advocate for a paradigm shift. Instead of resolutions centered on changing our bodies, let's focus on resolutions that nurture our whole being including mental health and fostering connections with community. Making small, achievable goals that focus on being kind to yourself can bring about lasting changes without the negative feelings that come with regular resolutions.

Self-Compassion: A Sustainable Resolution

One powerful resolution is the commitment to self-compassion. In a world that often demands perfection, learning to treat ourselves with kindness and understanding is revolutionary. By setting an intention to be gentler with ourselves, we create space for genuine self-love and acceptance.   Once we are in this space we may be able to explore change in a more meaningful, realistic, and sustainable way.

Positive Relationships: A Determinant of Life Satisfaction

Another transformative resolution is the pursuit of community and connection. Instead of isolating ourselves in the pursuit of individual goals, let's recognize the strength that comes from supporting and being supported by others. Making friends, being part of a group exercise, or joining community activities can make us feel good. Don’t wait until you’ve perfected the body ‘project’ to go out and participate in community and life.

Mindfulness: The Power of Slowing Down

Let's not forget the power of mindfulness and presence as a resolution. In a world that moves at an ever-increasing pace, taking time to pause, reconnect, and be present is a gift we can give ourselves. 

Alternatives to the Body ‘Project’
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Instead of focusing on losing weight or having a 'perfect' diet, it's better to focus on goals that really matter and can last a long time. Instead of restricting ourselves with rigid goals, we can strive for balance and harmony in our lives. Deciding to take care of yourself regularly, like receiving massage, exploring mindful eating, or healing your relationship with movement can make you feel good without feeling like you have to meet society's expectations.
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In conclusion, the New Year offers an opportunity for growth and transformation, but the traditional approach to resolutions often misses the mark. Instead of subjecting ourselves to the relentless pursuit of perfection, let's embrace resolutions that prioritize self-compassion, connection, and mindfulness. Small, realistic goals that nurture mental, physical, and emotional needs can lead to a profound and lasting sense of well-being.

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